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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?


#1105

It really is, it’s just good fun. It’s not a bad date-night movie either.


Moving on! (I’m sorry if this seems salty):

Why is divorce so expensive?

It’s worth it.


#1106

Is that a joke or just a sad truth, made extra sad because people will know this and deliberately make it more expensive, to pad their own pockets knowing that you don’t have any option but to pay?


#1107

Actually, to be honest, it wasn’t more expensive than my wedding. (rimshot!)


#1108

Make like a tree and give a campaign speech.
Make like a tree and talk like a dog.
Make like a tree and lightly rap on a highly asymmetric board game box.
Make like a tree and write a Twine game.


#1109

:facepalm:

I had no idea how one could make puns without actually making a pun, but you have achieved that goal @Gwathdring. You have gained the power of dad-jokes at a very young age.


#1110

It’s Halloween! Hopefully one of these will make you howl with laughter.

How do you write a book about Halloween? With a ghost writer.

Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?” The other monster replied, “Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”

Two ghosts walk into a bar. “Sorry,” said the barman, “we don’t serve spirits.”


#1111

A very good Halloween joke, I thought:


#1112

Just something I thought of:

Everybody from (X stereotype) is racist.


#1113

Something something cryptocurrency.


#1114

What is “What’s the best way to pay for a funeral?”

Correct.

I’ll take unfinished jokes spread haphazardly across multiple posts for 600, Alex.


#1115

Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? Because it raises their spirits!

How many vampires are in this room? I dont know, I cant Count Draculas.

What happened to the man who didn’t pay his exorcist? The house was repossessed.


#1116

Why are vampires stupid? Because they’re all suckers.


#1117

Me: Do you want to hear a joke about a ghost?

My son: Sure!

Me: That’s the spirit!


#1118

I just touched my monitor with my hand.

Don’t. It hertz.


#1119

Same thing happened with my rental car.

(Non-US people, HERTZ is a rental car company).


#1120

A bunch of electrons were trying to get to their seats on the the train. They almost never got there because the conductor was resistant.


#1121

I touched my face with my palm.
Because your joke is bad.
This isn’t a joke. (Just an awful haiku.)


#1122

Why can’t you hear a Pterodactyl going to the washroom?

Because the pee is silent!


#1123

I’ve loved that joke since the first time I had heard it.


#1124

This is real, this actually happened.

I was searching for jokes, and I asked my older son:
“What’s the funniest dad-joke you know?”

He replied:
“My birth?”

Oh lord I raised that young man right.