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I'm Out of the Box! (A safe place for gaymers)

That’s so cool! My favorite is “Brigadier,” by far (obviously, I just quoted you with that one word), but “Viscountess” puts the icing on the cake. I think I’ll put that list somewhere into the mix when my players are rolling up new characters. Thank you so much!

This is an interesting topic. I am probably the polar opposite, politically speaking, to most of you. However, I was also brought up to be courteous and considerate to others. As such, I’ll refer to anybody as anything they want me to. This is difficult sometimes when there are no established norms.

While I may be a “conservative”, if I like you, I like you. And I don’t give a damn if you share my politics.


Ha! @Boydesian, it’s no secret that you and I are at the other ends of that political/social spectrum, even in our tastes for game genres. But, as you already know, I frikking love you, man. We need to tabletop together soon, whether it’s a big fat wargame or 5 minutes of Love Letter or an endless RPG campaign, or even just arguing about discussing stuff we don’t agree on. I always thought you were pretty cool for your intelligence and willingness to go across the isle to hang out with fellow gaming nerds of all stripes. It makes me so happy you piped up here, it made my night!


I’ve been thinking about doing Deadlands, because “gunslingers.” And the card mechanic seems really thematically well matched to that genre. And also, I kind of live in a swamp, exploring the wild west would be more of a vacation for me than any fantasy realm.

From what I’ve found, there’s no real gendery, LGBTQ (aw christ, there’s a Q now just after I got used to the other acronym. There’s also a + sometimes, I can’t pronounce that whole mess) issues that come up, but it’s far from the most popular RPG, and there isn’t that much discussion online about how it treats orientation. If there are any cowboys, cowgirls, cowqueers, etc. who have experience, I’d like to hear from you before I double-down on the game.

I haven’t! I’ll have to pick them up. :smiley:

Anyone have any experience with Monsterhearts? It seems to frankly deal with sexuality and the period of life where you’re just all like “what the fuck is wrong with me?” and very friendly to the queer spectrum. It’s gotten a lot of praise.

But I’ve read the rules, critically and skeptically, hoping for something fun for me to find a hook for younger, queer or queer-friendly, players. There’s a lot of good stuff there, especially for RPGs with LGBT youths.

But there are rules that are in place where the success or failure of an interaction can basically amount to rape of or by an NPC or (worse) a player’s character. Yes, there are other, more primary rules that allow any player to opt out of that, but a rule set for getting sex with contested dice rolls seems a little gross to me.

I don’t know, maybe my interpretation’s wrong, and I was off-put by the Twilight-ish twee aspects.

It seems that Avery Mcdaldno also has a queer-specific RPG Dream Askew available on their site. I haven’t tried either, but deliberately queered mechanics might work easier for your group than Monsterhearts?

Also if you are uncomfortable about the dice-roll-decision-making, you should totally retcon it with house rules to something you feel is appropriate but maintains the spirit of the game.

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Don’t get me wrong, I’m totally fine with manipulating game rules to fit the crowd. We’re such a small community (board gamers), and an even smaller community here, I tend to trust our judgement more, because I tend to trust our people here more. It’s very cozy.

I was just asking if anyone else got the same interpretation or if I was reading too much into it. It’s a pretty small game for even our own small pond, I wasn’t optimistic about getting any responses, so reading yours was a pleasant surprise!

I looked over Dream Askew a while ago, and thematically it’s not as interesting to me as the monster high school theme, but that’s just me. A personal taste thing, it just doesn’t seem as fun as “monster high-school,” especially with addressing that time in your life where it’s kind of freaky, because both your body and your urges seem to be no longer under your control (Why do I have a huge hair there? Why did I just imagine the coach naked? whatishappening?!?!?)

Dream Askew’s forcibly queer, though, and that’s a big turn-off for me. It’s just as odd to me as people arguing for straight marriage only. It’s non-inclusive, like a queer country club that won’t let straights in.

Not that I resent that or think it isn’t deserved, or even that exclusively openly queer hobby groups shouldn’t be required today for socialization, it promotes civil rights normalization. I respect Buried Without Ceremony for bringing their Q-flavor of games into what’s often a testosterone-laden cis white male hobby.

I just don’t want to play a game where my straight friends will feel excluded.

Tomorrow is the anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion. Just a mention.

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I wish I had more experience with RPGs so I could offer some useful advice!

I definitely laud your goal to keep things inclusive, though it’s interesting to talk about forced exclusion as a deliberate roleplaying mechanic to illustrate the author’s point.

I’m curious to see if/how VR technology is going to be utilized by queer gamemakers to help express things like gender dysphoria.

And this weekend’s NYC Pride celebration is the first year with the Stonewall Inn marked as a US National Monument, too. If I hadn’t been at work all day, I’d’ve gone down and snapped some photos of what I’m sure is an exuberant celebration in the face of all this tragedy.


I’ll be in the FLA July 6 to July 13. I have your number and email and will contact you before I head down. Hopefully I’ll see you soon!

PS. If we do meet, we’ll have to take a selfie for the thread.


Whoooooo! Yes!

I’ll have to post a new selfie so you can recognize me, I got most of my hair cut off because It’s Fucking Florida, and carrying around a ponytail for years gets tiresome in the summer. Blah.

(And also, I was hoping for a “Cillian Murphy in Peaky Blinders” look, but I’m not Cillian Murphy, and that will never happen. I mean, I want to pinch his cheeks but I don’t think I could find them.)

Apropos of nothing, sorry for going even further off-topic (yes, I know, it’s my own dammed thread),

I just realized I want to name the next dog I have “OKGoogleNow” just to fuck with the heads of people at the dog park who’s phones will suddenly turn on.

On track again! Catacombs: I think that on the hero team, the skeleton explorer hero, Marorg, is way more of an ix than a him (I’m sorry if I screwed that pronoun usage up), and Regulus is definitely of the metrosexual, Twilight-y persuasion. Just, you know… vampire noble. No real choice there.

Sorry if you don’t have experience with the current edition kids, I would have provided links to the images but it proved to be harder to find than I thought. I failed.

Oh hi. I’m a gay cis male (if a bit gender agnostic, or something: Vi Hart’s video on gender felt familiar) who thus far hasn’t been very active on the forums or comment threads. And I’ve been out for ages and I live in a major city and generally play with friends rather than strangers, so the issues in the original post don’t really come up for me.

I don’t play RPGs particularly and these issues haven’t come up in most of the board games we play. Um. I feel like I have nothing substantive to add here. But I figured I’d drop my head in and say hi: Hi!

(I guess I’ll say to @MinuteWalt, way above, that there are millions of fluent Esperanto speakers—it’s an incredibly easy language to pick up, far easier than any natural language—and it’s estimated that there are a few dozen Klingon speakers, well under 100. But that’s a different topic altogether!)


Hrm, several of my board gaming buddies are gay/lesbian/bi and I’m in the Bay Area so everyone else is LGBTQ-friendly. :stuck_out_tongue:

I don’t really play RPGs but we did play Fiasco once and we had a thinly disguised Fox Mulder character (played by a gay man) having sex with… I think a thinly disguised Krycek character (played by a straight or possibly bi woman) during the game. :smiley:

I guess I take it for granted that it isn’t a thing around here. :confused:


You get a big fat “like” just for mentioning ViHeart. All the love there, she’s awesome. And yes, I admit I was being a little flippant about Esperanto, sorry. I’ve found it as vexing as any other language that wasn’t of the machine-variety, but that’s just me.

I do know more people who speak Klingon than Esperanto, but that’s like, 1 vs. 0, not exactly a good statistical sample, and speaks volumes more about the kind of people I choose to hang out with, really.

Yay, @Tika! Thanks for dropping by, you’re one of my favorite ever people!

We’re not really talking about RPGs, I suppose. It just seems to be one instance that comes up frequently when it comes to gender and sexuality.

For instance, I’ve played many a game of The Game of Life (yes, I know, hush everyone, at least it’s not Monopoly) where both the pegs in the front seat of the car were pink or blue. It just happened, and we rolled with it. And this was with my family!

I kind of started it, I admit. But at the time the rules still said “a man and a woman” instead of even just saying “a pink and a blue peg,” (I think, don’t quote me on that. I do remember someone felt they had to look it up, possibly me.)

I was playing a pink peg (I think I was just being obstinate at the time), and had chosen another pink peg when it was my turn to “get married” (again, I think I was just doing it just to be contrary). I ended up with a car full of kids, and I’m pretty sure I won? I don’t remember, it was a long time ago.

Since then, anytime we’ve played it, someone’s ended up with a gay couple in the front seats. I feel strangely proud of that.

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Whenever there are gendered characters in board games (which is not often), everyone just picks whoever appeals to them. Pretty often the straight guys will choose a female character, which is why I don’t get the arguments against having more female characters in board games; the historical accuracy thing is laughable given how many historical inaccuracies there are anyway, and even if publishers think that the target market for their game is mostly male, I think men appreciate having female characters in the selection too!

I like that Isaac Vega at Plaid Hat Games has great character diversity in his games (Dead of Winter, Ashes), even including a transgender Phoenixborn in one of the expansions.

I think if my game group encountered a game that implied romantic relationships should only be between a male and female, we would frown upon it. :frowning:


Well, hi! Now you know me. My Esperanto is insanely rusty, as I learned it when I was a teenager. (It took about 2 weeks to learn the grammar, and a few months before I had enough vocab to carry on conversations. I’m a bit talented with that sort of thing I guess, but still: 2 weeks!) Anyway it’s not as if I was offended or anything. But if you’re interested in these things, Arika Orkent’s “In the Land of Invented Languages” is a pretty fantastic book!

And Vi Hart is totally awesomesaucesome.


This is what always baffles me. If you’re playing a game and are given a choice of character, why would you want to just play yourself? Especially RPGs, where the entire point of the game is being a character.

And now I’m even more annoyed that no one is selling the Ashes expansions in the UK :sob: